freedom



I've decided to give myself a gift for Mothers Day.  Initially, it may look like some sort of fast or sacrifice, but in reality, it is freedom.  I'm breaking off my dysfunctional relationship with facebook.  The problem with dysfunctional relationships is they hide behind a mask of normal.  Before you know it, it's a habit with a false sense of security & reality that you develop a dependence on to distract you from the things in life that you'd sooner forget about.  The problem is this dependence turns into a distraction from all the things you treasure the most.

 

Since I'm all about transparency, these last few years have been some of our hardest around here.  While we had the amazing privilege of becoming parents to four more sweet children during this time, we've also lost a beloved father and  two grandparents, dealt with disappointments in situations & people, forged our way through a doctoral program, experienced two of our babies spread their wings & leave the nest, all the while trying to be mindful of the path God would have us travel.

 

But I lost my way.  The need for encouragement, affirmation, & comfort had me turning to FB.  Facebook became my connection to a false reality that allowed avoidance of the stuff that hurts. While I believe in transparency, I also believe in not throwing privacy out the window, so my list may not seem like a big deal compared to other tragedies in the news (which right there is part of my problem...I diminish our personal hard by comparing it to other hard), but it has proven to be a challenging season. 

 

Here's the problem with avoidance...It's kinda like dog poop in the winter.  You can pretend it's not there, but when the snow melts, it's still there.  I wouldn't know this on a personal level.  I did mow the dog poop grass the other day, though.

 

Where were we?

 

Oh, right, avoidance.  Doesn't work.  Not good.  And while you're avoiding the crap (ha!), you're also being distracted away from all that's good in your little world & all that God may be trying to teach you in the midst of it all.  We are emotional beings.  We are meant to experience life with feelings, the good ones & the bad ones.  Those feelings...they grow your heart & strengthen your grit.  I fear I have temporarily bought into the lie that my connectedness to a happy life happens through a screen.

 

So, here we are.  I've missed blogging because it feels more intentional, so as it fits, I will continue to share bits on family & other topics close to my heart.  As for facebook, I'm off indefinitely.  I am off to spend time with the Lord, walk through the grief & other hard feelings, & to enjoy those I treasure most...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
 but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint."  ~Isaiah 40:30-31